It’s autumn here in Ontario, a season that teaches just how beautiful change is and that everything is temporary. Let me say that again. Everything is temporary. Everything. Your current job, or schooling, the place you call home, the pain and joy you experience, the very life you are living, it’s ALL temporary. An exciting realization while it can bring peace and comfort it can also provoke fear and anxiety as you try to cling to moments, memories “good” or “bad.”
Last week, we had some rather active weather, the winds of change were howling through the day and night clearing away the old ways of thinking and living. I see my current situation as a massive catalyst for the new women emerging, one who is putting the last four years of pain, misery, depression, restrictions, defiance, combativeness, and desperation behind her. Ok, it wasn’t all negative, but much of it was as with each setback whether instigated by a lack of reasonable judgment or lousy luck beat me down more and more.
Thankfully, during this time I never stopped flipping rocks. What I realize now, laying here writing this out, that’s my thing; I don’t give up. I push on regardless of the size of the mountain in front of me, and the last time I checked, BOLGERS DON’T QUIT! That was my mindset in racing, and sure as hell has been in trying to find a way to live a joy-filled life the last few years and now I’m on the other side of it all.
So where is all this coming from you may be asking at this point? Well, on Tuesday, October 30th Dr. Dwyer and I met at Women’s College Hospital for our third rendezvous where he repaired the right hip labral tear, a souvenir from my Ironman triathlon days. During the 2.5 hour procedure, the labrum, responsible for keeping the hip joint snug and secure, was sewn back together (very technical medical terms here) along with some work to reshape the big ball at the top of the femur bone in my leg (it’s called the femoral head). Shaving down this area allows the bone to move around in the joint more freely as the socket part of the joint where the femoral head fits into, was overgrown (and slighted tilted). They needed to make some space.
I barely recall any details from the recovery room, except where the lovely anesthesiologist gave me some VERY good painkillers and that I told him the nerve-block they gave me pre-operatively was a lie. No post op pics this time folks, cause that pain was NO joke! An hour later, the nurses in the post-op daycare hopped me up on more pain meds, we saw my surgeon again, and they sent us on our way. We got home that afternoon, and I resurfaced sometime Friday, feeling somewhat like a human again. Fast track to today, post op day 13 and recovery is coming along nicely. Two weeks in now and I’ve got the hang of crutches, they’re my best friend for the next four weeks, and I assume a few more following that, once I get to put weight on my foot again.
For now, I’m here watching Netflix, reading or listening to an audiobook and just letting my body do what it needs to do; heal. This long time coming for this, and I plan to do everything in power to provide the best conditions possible for my body to work its magic. On that note, very happy to say that today is the last day of the #gameready recovery system. It’s a unit that comes with looks like half a pair of men’s hockey shorts (it’s a giant wrap) that ices and compresses my leg and hip reducing pain, swelling and speeding up the recovery period. It’s a great tool, and thankful to have had it.
As the days continue, I’m going to remind myself as I mentioned earlier, this is temporary. Every day that passes is another day done in recovery, and before I know it, physio begins, and I get to start building back my strength and put this even farther behind me. Full disclosure, technically this post was started last week but had to cut the keyboard time short due to discomfort. Back at it today but wrapping this up soon for the same reasons.
Besides some physical pain, there have been a few moments; they weren’t dark or sad, but emotional. Perhaps because it has been such a long road and a very steep hill to climb, but as my husband said, I get to put it in high gear and enjoy the downslope now. And he’s right. So with that, my spirits are high as I continue to ride the recovery waves.